


Hold Me Tight

by Jam_less



Category: ARMY - Fandom, Kpop - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-22 06:08:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14302503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jam_less/pseuds/Jam_less
Summary: "Jungkook, he's falling apart!" Yoongi said angrily, "He needs you. Even if you don't love him back, he needs his best friend right now."





	1. 1

        Taehyung walked through empty white hallways, his heart fluttering with worry, regret, and guilt. He trailed behind a man in dark blue, with a white coat over the blue, and a clipboard in his hand, striding ahead confidently. It crossed Tae's mind to turn back and leave, as he knew the sight he would soon see would be hard to bear, but it couldn't be as bad as what Taehyung had already gone through.

        Besides, he told himself, If I'm not there when he wakes up, he'll have nobody to comfort him. Taehyung purposefully left out that he had been the cause of this.

        The man in front of Tae turned a corner to the right and stopping after a few more steps at a door on the left side of the hallway. He stepped back, gesturing for Tae to enter first. He took a deep breath and stepped forward, his heart racing as he pushed the door open, closing his eyes. 

        When he opened his eyes again, he looked around to see himself in a hospital room, his white surroundings giving off a morbid feel. In the center of the room, a brown-haired boy lay in the hospital bed, hooked up to wire after wire, his chest covered in bandages, multiple machines drawn to the side of the bed and connected to the wires and tubes. 

        Tae's guild hardened in his chest, becoming ten times worse as he saw his friend, who had become even more than that in the past few weeks lying here like this, barely alive. 

        He didn't think he had the strength to move, but the next thing he knew, he was as the side of the bed, gripping his left hand around the occupant's own. Seeing someone so close to him like this, a crushing feeling spread through his heart, and tears streamed down his face as he fell to his knees, still gripping his friend's hand.

        "I'm sorry," he whispered, barely loud enough to hear, "I'm so sorry."

***

(3 weeks and 2 days earlier)

        "I think I'm going to head back to my place," Jimin said, looking over at J-hope, "Wanna hang out for a while?"

        "Sure," Hobi said with a smile, lifting up his plate to bring it to the kitchen along with Jimin. 

        Taehyung, Jungkook, Jin, Jimin, and J-hope had been eating dinner together, the food cooked by Jin obviously. They sat at the table in their dinning room. Namjoon and Yoongi were both out, working on new songs and whatnot.

        "I think I'll be leaving too, Namjoon wanted me to come over to the studio for a while to help him work out some things," Jin said, also getting up. He picked up Jungkook's plate along with his own, carrying them to the kitchen to wash. Jungkook and Taehyung got up and followed, walking into the kitched with the rest of the dishes and putting them in the sink. Jin filled it with warm water and soap, splashing some at Jungkook when he got close. 

        "Hey! Watch it, I just got this shirt!" Jungkook exclaimed, but a smile crossed his face. He grabbed a towel, drying the dishes after Jin washed them. 

        Jimin and J-hope left after a brief goodbye, racing out of the apartment together, heading back to their place. 

        Halfway through dishes, Jin looked at his watch and gasped. "Shoot, I was supposed to meet up with Namjoon five minutes ago! Would you mind finishing these?" he asked Taehyung, who reassured him with an "Of course!" and began to clean, making small talk and laughing with Jungkook as Jin hurried out of the apartment. They quickly finished up cleaning the kitchen, working efficiently together. 

        "Well, that was a good dinner," Jungkook said, patting his stomach in a satisfied manner. 

        "Yeah, Jin hyung makes the best food," Taehyung responded, his box smiled spread across his face. 

        "I'll see you tomorrow?" Jungkook asked, grabbing his coat from the rack, and sliding it on. 

        "Yeah, I'll be there."

        "Well, see you then!"

        Jungkook opened the door the the apartment, beginning to step out, but Tae quickly stopped him. 

        "Wait!" he said, fiddling with his fingers in a shy manner as he looked at the ground, obviously nervous about something.

        "What is it, hyung?" Jungkook asked, looking back at Tae. 

        "I- I want to tell you something," Tae responded, taking a deep breath, his heart pounding against his rib cage. 

        "Yes?"

        "Jungkook-ah, I want to be around you more often," Tae said, "You mean a lot to me."

        "Okay hyung, just tell me when you want to hang out, I'm down for it," Jungkook responded, but Tae cut him off. 

        "I don't mean like that. I want to be with you all the time, but when you walk in the room I can't think. You make me nervous, and when I'm close-" he paused, "When I'm closed to you, I feel the urge to embrace you. I don't understand what's happening to me, but it's getting in the way of my work, and it's been this way for a long time, but is only getting worse. I need to know something. Jung... Jungkookie, I love you. I need to know if you love me too."

        Taehyung looked up to meet Jungkook's eyes, but he couldn't read any emotion in them. They stood there for a moment, but only a moment, because the next thing Taehyung knew, Jungkook had streaked out of his apartment, leaving Taehyung alone, a crushing feeling in his chest. 

        ***

(Six days later) 

        Taehyung sat at the desk in his room, his eyes watching the screen in front of him, but his mind unfocused, drifting back to six days ago. He had never heard back from Jungkook, and knew to take it as a no, the deep sadness that filled him beginning to get overwhelming in the last few days, enough so that he had to ask Yoongi for an anti-depressant, not telling him what he was depressed about though. 

        None of the other members had picked up on this yet, though it was only a matter of time. Tae and Jungkook were usually really close, they would notice if Jungkook and Tae avoided each other. 

        He regretted it all, the dinner, the confession. At times, V wished it was back to normal, Jungkook not knowing about his love. Then at least he could see him. Tae pushed himself back into reality, rubbing his temples to wake himself up. He had promised to help compose this song with Yoongi, but had been slacking off recently, unable to write anything or stay focused for long.        

        Taehyung was running over the possibility of telling Yoongi that he would be unable to help with the rest of the song, when he heard a quiet knock on his apartment door, almost to quiet to hear. 

        He paused what he was doing, getting up when there was another knock, walking over to the door. Tae twisted the doorknob, pulling it open to see Yoongi standing on the other side, a serious expression on his face. 

        "What's going on with you?" he asked as soon as the door was open, striding in with confidence. 

        "Nothing."

        "Don't lie to me Tae. You came to me asking for an anti-depressant, which I would expect the least from you of all people. You haven't written anything on the draft of the song in the past week, and you look like a wreck," Yoongi insisted.

        "I'm fine," Tae lied, turning and walking away. 

        "No you're not," Yoongi said, making Tae pause, "I don't know what's happened, but you need some help."

        "I don't need a therapist, hyung," Taehyung grumbled.

        "I'm not talking about a therapist. Just let me help you. You need to eat more, you're too skinny. When was the last time you took a shower?"

        "How would you help!?" Tae yelled eyes fiery as he glared at his hyung, "You would never understand. It took me months to build up courage, only to be shoved back to how I was before."

        "I understand," Yoongi said, "I suffered from depression when I was younger, I know how to deal with it."

        Tae fell to his knees, his face in his hands "I do need help."

        "I'll help you, Tae-ah," Yoongi said, kneeling next to his friend and patting his back, "You don't need to tell me what happened, but I'll be right here if you want to."

        "It's Jungkookie," Tae said, looking up at Yoongi, tears streaming down his face, "I ruined everything."

        Yoongi patted Tae's back again, slightly unsure what to do. Yoongi was a bit awkward, but wrapped his arms around Tae, comforting him.

        "I told him..." Tae said, "I told him."

        "What did you tell him?"

        "I told him- I told him that I love him," Tae said, burrying his face in his hands, "and he ran."

        Yoongi stroked Tae's hair, everything fitting together for him now. Nobody had talked to Jungkook for a while, he was always working these past few days, always busy. He had wondered what had happened to Tae to make him feel so horrid, and it now made sense. "It'll be okay," Yoongi reassured Tae.

        "Are you sure?" Tae asked, looking up.

        "Yes. Everything must come to an end. He'll get over it, and so will you. Let's get you cleaned up," Yoongi helped Tae stand up, walking him towards the bathroom, where he told Tae to take a shower, closing the door and sitting on the couch waiting for Tae to finish.

        It all made sense now, Tae's gradual change, and now this. He rubbed his eyes, remembering what he had gone through when he was younger, hoping that Tae would get over it quickly, as Yoongi didn't want Tae to go through what he had gone through.


	2. 2

(Two Days Later)

       Yoongi sat at his desk, working hard on a song he was currently composing, but his mind kept drifting back to Taehyung, and his current situation. 

        Tae had changed in the past two days, and it worried Yoongi, who didn't see anything good in his change. Instead of lying in grief, Yoongi's friend now worked day and night, sitting on his computer and working on the song he had almost been kicked from composing.

        Two days ago, Yoongi had showed up at Taehyung's place only to find Tae gone, and the place empty. Upon calling Taehyung, he found out that he had been at the gym, working out. Arriving at the gym, he asked the woman at the front desk if she had seen Tae, and she told him that Tae had been there since they opened, at five that morning. Yoongi rushed Taehyung home, attempting to get him to eat, but he had refused, calling himself spoiled and fat. After Yoongi tried to get some sense into him, Tae locked himself in his bedroom and worked on the song. 

        It hurt Yoongi to see his friend in such a condition, and it needed to change quick, but there was only one way he could think of, and he didn't know if it would work. 

***

        "Jungkook-ah? Are you there?" Yoongi knocked on the maknae's office door, hearing someone shuffle around inside. 

        "Coming," a voice called from inside, and a few moments later the door in front of Yoongi swung open, Jungkook standing in the doorway. 

        Yoongi was surprised to see that Jungkook had changed since he had last seen him, five or so days ago. He had large bags under his eyes, and it seemed he had shrunk, seeming small in his oversize T-shirt. 

        "Hey, hyung," he said, smiling and opening the door to let Yoongi in, but he had already brushed past him, walking into Jungkook's office before turning around to face the maknae, who slowly closed the door. 

        "Jungkook, we need to talk," he said solemnly, the seriousness of the matter easily expressed on his face. "It's about Taehyung."

        Jungkook turned away from Yoongi, going back to his desk where he seated himself, and pretended as if he didn't hear Yoongi. 

        "Jungkook, he's falling apart!" Yoongi said angrily, "He needs you. Even if you don't love him back, he needs his best friend right now."

        Jungkook stayed silent, rubbing his face with his hands, but Yoongi only got louder. 

        "Are you just going to let him crumble without doing anything? He's your best friend! Don't you care?" Yoongi shouted at Jungkook, but at his last comment, the maknae spun around angrily, leaping out of his chair. 

        "Of course I care! How could I not care? We knew each other for so long! We went through so much together, and you think that I don't care if he gets hurt?" Jungkook shouted back, tears gleaming in his eyes, before his voice quieted, "It's just so confusing. I- I don't understand what's happening to me."

        Yoongi stood in his spot, shocked. He had though Jungkook to be angry at Tae, but the truth dawned on him as he watched the maknae fall back in his chair and cover his face in his hands. 

        "What would he think? What would my parent think if I told them I loved Taehyung?" Jungkook said, "What would my hyungs think? They would never support me."

        Yoongi stepped forward, wishing only to comfort his friend. 

        "Jungkook-ah. We would support you no matter what," Yoongi said, "I'm sure the other members agree."

        "Yoongi hyung, you don't understand. My parents gave me everything I ever needed, everything I ever had. They love me so much. But they will never support this."

        "If they truly love you, they will support you no matter what. They might tell you you are making a mistake at first, but they won't understand at first," Yoongi said, "Jungkookie, do this for TaeTae. Do this for you."

        Jungkook looked up at his hyung, tear streaks glimmering down his cheeks. "Help me, hyung. Please."

***

        Taehyung's arms ached, and he could barely keep his eyes open, but he forced his body down and up, counting his 187th push-up. He forced himself to repeat the process, doing another. The fiery pain in his arms and chest ignited stronger than before, causing him to gasp and shudder, struggling for breath.

        You should be dead, he told himself, You can't make it to 200, you pathetic lump of fat. Nobody will ever want you.

        Tae struggled to continue, forcing himself to do another push-up. He had never been athletic, his breathing was ragged, the pain in his lungs made it hard to think. The only thing he could focus on was the pain, and he forced himself down and up again, gritting his teeth against the pain as he continued. 

        Just ten more. Ignore the pain. You deserve it anyway.

        Tae didn't hear the knocking on his apartment door, his ears ringing, so close to finishing his task. He blinked to clear his vision as it blurred, dark spots blocking his sight.

        The knock came again louder than before, but Tae continued, unable to hear it. His head spun, and he couldn't think as he felt himself unable to push his body up, his arms shaking. 

        Just before his vision went black, Tae felt his arms give way. 

***

        "Taehyung!" Yoongi called, banging on his door much harder than before. The gym was currently closed, so he knew Tae was home. "Watch out," he muttered to Jungkook, stepping back before running forward again and slamming into the door, the hinges creaking as it swung open under Yoongi's weight. 

        As he looked around, Yoongi spotted the younger's body splayed out on the ground, eyes closed, chest fluttering up and down softly. 

        "Tae!" Yoongi rushed to his friend's side, but Jungkook beat him there, rolling Tae over carefully. 

        "Taehyung," Jungkook shuddered, barely able to see his hyung like this, "I'm so sorry."

        "Don't be..." a weak voice said back, and Jungkook looked down to see Taehyung's eyes open, and brighter than they had been in a while. 

        "This is my fault. I was afraid to tell you-" Jungkook paused, "To tell you that I love you too."

        Jungkook leaned down and wrapped his arms around Taehyung, embracing him tightly.

        "Min Yoongi told me what you've been doing to yourself, hyung," Jungkook said, pulling back. "You need to stop. You're perfect just the way you are."

        Taehyung just nodded barely caring what Jungkook was warning him about. He was still caught in a few moments ago, his body filled with enough joy to get him through the rest of his life. I love you too. Taehyung ran the words through his mind over and over, barely able to believe they had come from Jungkook's lips.

        "Okay, I will," he promised, leaning back and closing his eyes, finally at peace.


	3. Chapter 3

        (The next day)

        "The concert was rescheduled, it will now be about two weeks from now," their manager told them, scurrying to get the info out quick, "We'll need to get prepared faster. We've been getting ready for about two months, but now that the date was changed, we have less time. The outfits have been chosen, you all know which songs you are doing, and in what order. In case you forgot, I've emailed each of you a list, along with certain other things you'll need such as practice times throughout the next two weeks. We'll need to practice more, so let's get going everyone."

        The seven members who stood in the room got ready to leave and quickly get their practice clothes and equipment, but their leader stepped forward, words already rolling off his tongue. 

        "What about ARMY? Aren't there some people who can't make it to the new time?" he asked, concerned about their fans, something that the other members greatly admired about him. 

        "Yes, of course, some people couldn't make it, but we gave them all refunds for their tickets and have sold the seats. The stadium is full, there won't be an empty seat," their manager replied, smiling at Namjoon, "You don't have to worry about that."

        Namjoon smiled back, and lead the other members outside. As they all rushed to get everything for their practice, Taehyung snuck a glance at Jungkook, who seemed to be fairly busy, digging in the drawers in his desk. 

        "If you are one of the seven members, please be in the practice room in ten minutes," a voice said of the announcer, forcing Taehyung to look away from Jungkook. He quickly got dressed for practice, grabbing what he needed and running to the practice room, where he was the last person to come in. 

        "Glad you could join us Taehyung, are you all ready to begin?" their dance instructor asked, not waiting for anyone to answer before continuing, "Today we will be practicing the first half of the concert, starting with Fire, and continuing in in the order that we have been working on for the past few months. Ready?"

        The seven members responded in their own way, nodding or answering with a confident, "Yes!" as they got into their positions, Tae struggling to remember where he was supposed to be.

        The instructor clicked a button on top of the speaker, causing their song to start. They went through it fairly smoothly, being helped out by not only their instructor but also Jimin and J-hope who had, to nobody's surprise already mastered the dance, performing it with ease.

        The rest of the day continued in this fashion, all of the members practicing hard, and helping each other. Though most of the dances we fairly simple compared to others they had performed, Tae found himself messing up more than usual, his focus snapped in half as he stole glances at Jungkook, only to lose his place and be scolded by one of the three dance prodigies in the room. 

        They took a break around lunch time, but it went quick, the seven members quickly grabbing a lunch before heading back to the practice room where they discussed certain things to improve their performance before getting back to practicing until four in the afternoon.

        "Practice starts at 10 tomorrow morning, be there!" their instructor called as they all grabbed their things and began to leave. 

        They all pretended not to hear in a rush to leave. Taehyung spotted Yoongi and Namjoon heading towards their office, both currently working on multiple songs, staying late to finish them. This was one of the reasons Namjoon hadn't noticed Taehyung's change over the past few weeks, because he was almost never home, and had been working hard on new songs to be released within the next year. 

        Tae walked back to his office, tired from practice. It had been a long day, and all he wanted to do now was go back to his apartment. Though he was tired, he got to work in his office, editing and adding new things to the song he was working on with Yoongi.

        He stayed there working for a while, his eyes slowly drooping shut, constantly checking the time, until it finally read 5:00, the time he usually leaves his office. He grabbed his coat, changing quickly into his normal clothes and racing out the door of his office. He called a taxi, barely waiting any time at all before one showed up to take him home, and sat in the back seat, looking out the window until his phone buzzed from his coat pocket. 

        Assuming it was Jimin, texting him to tell him that Tae had forgotten something in his office, he pulled it from his pocket and barely spared it a glance. As his eyes scanned over the words on the screen, his heart skipped a beat. 

        Jungkook: Want to go to dinner with me tonight? I have a reservation at the nicest place in town. 6:00. Text me back if you can make it.

        Tae barely realized what he was doing as he quickly unlocked his phone and replied, saying he would make it. As he clicked send, he looked at the time and groaned. It was 5:15 already, and he would be back to his apartment at about 5:20, giving him barely 25 minutes to get ready and get out the door if he wanted to make it on time. 

        Quickly gathering his things, he paid the taxi driver quickly and rushed out of the car, racing into the apartment building and flying up the steps three at a time before stopping on his level and rushing through his front door. 

        Taehyung dumped his stuff on the floor of the apartment, not caring that he was messing up his perfectly organized and clean apartment that he prized greatly. He raced into his room and dove into his closet, silently thanking himself for having so many unique, nice outfits. 

        As he picked and chose certain things he though Jungkook might like, he lay out certain noteworthy outfits on his bed before quickly trying them on, and picking out his favorite, a suit with black pants and black dress shoes, a dark blue button-down shirt under a black suit coat with dark blue trimming and golden floral designs. He quickly styled and brushed his black hair, slipping three rings onto his right hand and two onto his left, along with a nice Rolex watch onto his left wrist. 

        Checking the time, it was about 5:40, giving Tae five minutes to grab his phone and wallet and adding the last few finishing touches to his outfit, fixing his hair just the slightest before calling another taxi and making his way down to the street, where there was a taxi ready in no time. 

        Taehyung got in the car, his heart beating faster than ever before as he rode to his meeting place with Jungkook, checking his phone one last time to make sure it hadn't been canceled. The car stopped, and he paid the driver before stepping out, checking his watch to see the time was 6:03, a few minutes late. His hands fidgeting with his rings as he spotted Jungkook standing just 20 feet away, by the door to the restaurant. He wore a suit too, a black coat with thin white stripes covering a white button-down shirt that sported a black bowtie, neatly folded beneath his collar. His pants also had thins white stripes, and he wore black dress shoes, similar to the ones Taehyung wore himself. 

        At soon as Jungkook's eyes landed on Tae, he flashed his bunny smile, turning to face Tae as he approached.

        "Fashionably late, I see," Jungkook joked, leading Tae inside, where lighting was dimmed, waiters walking around and delivering service to the tables that were fairly well spread apart, giving each one privacy. 

        "Sorry about that," Tae said, his cheeks flushing in his embarrassment as Jungkook walked up to the counter and asked about his reservation. 

        "It's totally fine, don't worry about a thing. Besides, I would rather you be late than not here are all," Jungkook said, smiling reassuringly and following the waitress as she led them to their table. They sat down together, taking seats opposite each other.

        They both opened their menus and made small talk about what was there, attempting to lighten the awkward silence that seemed to haunt them. 

        "I see Gejang on the menu," Jungkook commented, pointing out one of the more expensive dished, "I know you like to eat that."

        "True," V responded, "But I'm also eyeing that Japchae, as it sounds good."

        "Taehyung-ah, get what you want, price doesn't matter. Please eat what you want, you deserve it" Jungkook laughed, "Let's just have a good night."

        "Fine," Tae sighed, "That Gejang does look amazing."

        "So is that what you'll be getting?" Jungkook asked, closing his menu and locking eyes with Taehyung, making his heart flutter. 

        "Yes, how about you?" 

        "I'll be having the Dakkochi, I had it once a while back and it was really good."

        Tae leaned over, summoning a waitress who was just passing. "We know what we'll be having," he said to her, looking back at Jungkook for him to go first. 

        "I'll have the Dakkochi," Jungkook said, allowing the waitress to write it down before looking at Tae to order. 

        "I would like the Gejang, thank you," Tae said, "and we'll be fine with water." 

        The waitress nodded politely and walked away from the table, carrying their order to the kitchen. Jungkook looked back at Tae, was playing with his rings, blushing awkwardly. 

        "Hyung, why don't you look at me?" Jungkook asked, smiling playfully as he teased Taehyung, "I thought you liked me?"

        "Jungkook, don't play with me like this," Taehyung responded as he looked up, smiling.

        "For all of your energy and confident behavior around the others, you seem pretty timid," Jungkook went on, swirling his water in his glass before having a sip and setting it back down, "You seem like a whole different person."

        "You make me nervous, Jungkook-ah," Tae confessed, "I can't be confident around you."

        "Tae, you don't need to be nervous. You know I feel the same way towards you as feel feels towards me. Though it seems strange when you can't look at me here, but you could watch me the entire time we were practicing today," Jungkook's eyes glistened with playfulness as he poked fun at his hyung. 

        "This is why you make me nervous," Tae shot back, smiling also.

        "But you make it too easy, hyung."

        "You chose an easy target."

        "Maybe, but I want you to feel more at home around me," Jungkook said, getting serious, "I don't like it when you are so nervous for no reason."

        "There is a reason, as I stated before. You are the reason, Jungkook-ah," Taehyung smiled, looking his friend in the eyes.

        "Aish, you're impossible. But at least I got you to look me in the eyes," Jungkook pointed out, smiling from ear to ear as Taehyung blushed.

        At that moment, the waitress saved Tae from Jungkook's teasing as she came out with their food, setting it out in front of them. She smiled before leaving, but they were both distracted by their food. 

        "Wow, that looks delicious," Jungkook said, pointing to Taehyung's Gejang with his chopsticks, before digging into his own Dakkochi.

        "It is," Taehyung said after taking a bite, "want to try?"

        "I may take you up on that offer later," Jungkook said, "But I'm currently busy with my meal, which is also very good. Maybe we'll switch for the last few bites?"

        "Sure," Tae responded, continuing to eat. They both sat there in silence while eating, stealing the occasional glance at one another. Finally, they switched dishes, each trying the other's dish to see if they liked it.

        "This is a good place, how did you find out about it?" Taehyung asked, preferring a small conversation over silence. 

        "Jin brought me here with Jimin after a long day once," Jungkook responded, "Have you been here before?"

        "Once with Jimin and Namjoon. I don't remember it being this good though."

        "They've stepped up their game recently, the menu was entirely changed," Jungkook said, "I think they had a small remodeling too, or maybe it was just a little expansion."

        "About what time did this happen?" Taehyung asked as the waitress came back and set the check down on the table before lifting up their dishes and carrying them back to the kitchen. 

        Taehyung reached for the check, but Jungkook pushed his hand away, lifting it up himself and setting his card on it. "I'm paying, it'd be weird if I invited you and had you paid," Jungkook said, looking back at Taehyung, legs crossed and hands clasped. 

        "How would it be weird?" Tae asked.

        "This happened about the same time I moved into my new apartment," Jungkook said, returning to their recent conversation as the waitress came back out and took the check before returning to the kitchen. 

        "Okay, so it was fairly recent," Tae responded, slightly disappointed at Jungkook's quick change of topic, "within the last month."

        "Yeah, recent enough that you still haven't ever been to my new apartment," Jungkook said as he stood up, thanking the waitress as she brought him back his card.

        "There's a first time for everything," Taehyung replied, making Jungkook flash his bunny smile.

        "Would you like to go back to my place tonight?" Jungkook asked as they walked side by side out of the restaurant. 

        "I would like to do so very much," Taehyung replied, and as a response Jungkook's hand curled around his own, causing Taehyung's cheeks to flush a deep red, and the skin that connected with Jungkook's own to burn, "but maybe another night, if you agree. Tonight has been wonderful but I agreed to help Namjoon with the formatting of one of his songs a while ago. I could always cancel, and come with you."

        "No, that's fine. I'll drive you home though. It's safer than a taxi, and you don't have to pay."

        Taehyung smiled, "You don't have to convince me."

        "I parked this way," Jungkook pulled him along, squeezing his hand in a way that made Taehyung's heart flutter.

        "I forgot you had a car," Tae said, looking at the nice car in front of him as Jungkook let go of his hand to climb into the driver's seat.

        "Yeah, I decided it would be worth my time to get one, since I recently got my license," Jungkook responded, "You still have failed to pass the test though!"

        "It was hard!" Taehyung complained, getting in the other front seat, and buckling in as Jungkook started the car, it's engine roaring to life impressively loud before Jungkook took off down the street, going just above the limit to show his own recklessness. 

        Jungkook snorted at Tae's last comment, unable to restrain from laughing, "It was the easiest thing I've ever done in my life."

        "Are you sure? Because it seems to me like lying comes pretty easy to you also," Taehyung retorted quickly, smiling at his own wit.

        "Aish, hyung! I wouldn't expect harsh words from you of all people," Jungkook laughed, "Besides, I would never lie to you. You should know that."

        "Don't worry, I know you would never lie to me," Taehyung said seriously, before cracking a smile, "Although you might exaggerate a little bit."

        "I will admit that. I've never been known to be the most accurate person when recounting events," Jungkook replied.

        "I'm surprised by that. After all, you are 'The Golden Maknae', good at just about everything," Tae laughed, watching the road pass by outside the car window. 

        "Well, not everything. I wasn't great at responding to your confession."

        "You just needed a little time. I understand how scary it can be to open yourself up to someone else."

        "Yeah, but you did it without a problem. I admire you for that, you know? You got straight to the point, telling me how you felt while others might hide it inside, scared that it would ruin everything."

        "I was scared that it would ruin everything. I bottled up my feelings for months before telling you how I felt. I was really scared. But you gave me strength. Thinking about you...well, I was given courage whenever I thought about being with you. I think that's what tipped the scale in the end, what made me confess."

       Jungkook looked over to see tears gleaming in Tae's eyes, the deep brown color filled with emotion. Jungkook reached his hand over and squeezed Taehyung's own hand,  smiling at him before returning his eyes to the road. 

        "I'm glad you told me," Jungkook said, "I'm glad to be with you."

        "Me too," Taehyung responded, squeezing Jungkook's hand back.


	4. 4

        The next week went by the same as the day before, Taehyung preparing hard for the concert during the day, and hanging out with Jungkook, or his friends around dinner time. They didn't go out to eat dinner anymore, and instead they ordered, or cooked themselves, struggling greatly with the latter. After dinner, they sat on the couch and watched a movie, or played a game, either video or board. Their conversations differed, going from won topic to another, joking and teasing as they went. It became easier for both of them to express themselves to each other, learning many now shared interests that had been hidden before. During any free time at work, Jungkook would take Taehyung down to the practice room and help him with the choreography that he had improve on quite a bit in the past week. 

        They knew the concert was their number one priority, and both accepted that, making time for each other when they were free, but not complaining when they had to get ready or go through the routine one more time. One of those rare times when they were released from their commitment happened to be exactly five days before to concert, when they were released from practice early to get some rest. 

        As soon as they were released, Taehyung raced back to his office to get changed, quickly stuffing his practice clothes in his bad and throwing on his casual wear before rushing to grab his phone and fumbling with it for a moment as he quickly make his was to contacts and clicked on "Jungkookie" scrambling to type out his thoughts, but already met with a vibration as a message from Jungkook flashed across the screen. 

Jungkook: So, about first times for everything...

        Quickly scanning over Jungkook's words, he sent his response curiously.

Taehyung: Yes?

        A few seconds after he sent it, Jungkook responded again, Taehyung reading it as he struggled out the door, grabbing his bag and coat while still holding his phone.

Jungkook: Would you like to come over to my house? It's only 6:00, and I have sushi.

Taehyung: I'll be over in 10, sushi sounds great!

        Tae shot back his response to the invitation before calling a taxi, and quickly organizing his things in his hands, shuffling on his coat and pulling his bag over his shoulder while he called for a taxi, barely able to contain his excitement while he waited. 

***

        "Coming, one moment!" a familiar voice called from behind the door after Taehyung quickly rapped his knuckles along to wood. He heard someone shuffling around behind the door, before there was a click and it swung open, Jungkook's bunny smile spreading across his face when he saw Taehyung there. 

        "Come in, come in." Jungkook said, offering to take Tae's coat, "It's a bit messy, you came on short notice."

        Tae handed Jungkook his coat, and slipped off his shoes, setting them on the mat next to the door that seemed to be there for that exact reason, having two nice pairs of shoes already on it. As Jungkook closed the door behind him, he looked around, surprised as his eyes fell upon a pristine living room filled with beautiful decor, nice furniture and exquisite paintings. "Messy?" Taehyung asked, looking around in awe, "Are you kidding me? You've seen my place, and you think that this is messy?"

        "It's messy for me," Jungkook said with a laugh, slipping his hand into Tae's and pulling him along, "This is just the living room. I'll give you a tour of the whole house."

        Tae's heart leaped at their contact, but his nervousness was soon replaced by a warm joy that spread through his body as Jungkook pulled him towards the hallway. "This is the kitchen," Jungkook said as they entered the room, again the sight stopping Taehyung in his tracks. The floor was glossy hardwood, and a large island sat in the middle of the room, made of wood that seemed to be similar to a build-in cutting board. Next to the sink and oven, Marble counters were arranged, neat drawers stacked under them, cooking knives displayed neatly on large magnets that were connected to cupboards above the counters. 

        "Wow, this is amazing!" he asid in awe, before teasing him, "Do you even know how to cook?" 

        "Of course!" Jungkook responded, seemingly offended, "but sometimes I'll have Soekjin hyung come cook for me."

        "I knew it," Tae teased as he was again pulled out into the hallway.

        "Shut your mouth, hyung," Jungkook snapped back, still smiling.

        "Why? Are you going to hire an assassin if I don't? Heck, buy the look of this you could hire a team of assassins!" 

        "You just watch yourself, maybe I will," Jungkook teased back, before changing the subject, "This is my office, but it's a mess so we'll stay out of there. The last room is my bedroom."

        Tae smiled as Jungkook opened the door and pulled him in, flicking on the lights and flopping down on a small couch that sat in front of the TV. Tae followed Jungkook's lead and flopped down next to him, sinking into the over-comfortable couch. 

        "What do you want to watch?" Jungkook asked, before clicking on one himself, "How about Hwarang? I still haven't checked it out after it was released."

        "I would prefer not to,"Taehyung laughed, stealing the remote from Jungkook and switching one he was interested in called "You Are the Apple of My Eye", "How about this?"

        "Whatever you want, hyung," Jungkook responded, "I'll go grab the sushi and be right back."

        Taehyung watched the trailer as Jungkook was in the kitchen, and clicked play as soon as he was back, carrying two plates full of sushi and two pairs of chopsticks. Jungkook took his seat again, passing Taehyung his plate and utensils. The two of them sat intently together, eating and watching the movie, relaxed in each other's presence. Every once in a while one would crack a joke, or whisper something to the other, causing both to laugh and eventually have to go back a minute or two in the movie because they missed something.

        Finishing their movie, Jungkook stole both their plates and took them to the kitchen while Taehyung chose another movie, this one more adapt for later in the night. The lights flicked off as Jungkook entered the room, the TV giving him all the light he needed to make his way back to his seat as the  second movie was started. 

        Taehyung leaned against Jungkook, fitting his head into the space between Jungkook's shoulder and neck, drawing back slightly as he felt his friend tense for a moment before they both relaxed, the atmosphere in the room softening. With the soft buzz of the TV, and the warmth of another being next to him, all thoughts left Taehyung's mind, and he was soon asleep.

***

        "Taehyung-ah," Jungkook's soft voice mingled in Taehyung's dreams, "hyung!"

        Tae's eyelids fluttered open, and he he lifted his head from where it lay, still nuzzled against Jungkook, who had recently begun to stir. 

        "Tae, are you awake?" Jungkook asked.

        His hyung responded with a nod before remembering it was too dark to see much. He could just make out Jungkook's silhouette in the dark room, the only light coming from the moon, slipping in from the window which had never been covered. The TV had automatically turned off a long time ago, at the end of the movie. "I'm awake Jungkookie," Tae responded, rubbing his eyes before standing up.

        "Hyung, it's 12 o'clock," Jungkook said, getting up after Taehyung and leading him to the door of the room, "you'd better get back to your apartment before Namjoon gets worried. Want me to turn on the light?"

        "No, I'd rather go in the dark," Tae responded disappointingly, "it'll be easier for you to get back to bed if you keep it off." 

        The two of them slipped through the house, eventually finding the door in the dark, Jungkook collecting Tae's things and handing him to them. "I really enjoyed tonight," he said nervously, "maybe we can do it again sometime after we're not so busy with the concert."

        "I'd love to," Tae responded, "This was an amazing first for me."

        Jungkook stayed silent for a moment after his hyung's comment, making Tae wonder if he had said something wrong. "Jungkookie?"

        "Taehyung, there's something I've been thinking about doing for a while now" Jungkook said quietly, "and I don't want to rush it, but right now seems like a good time."

        "I trust you," Taehyung said, slightly unsure of what Jungkook was talking about as Jungkook shifted in front of him. Tae waited there for second in the tense silence until he felt the warmth of the maknae's lips on his own, capturing them in a sweet, soft kiss. 

        Tae was immediately thankful for the cover of darkness as surprise flashed across his face, though once he realized what was happening he leaned into it, kissing Jungkook back and letting his forearms sit comfortably on his shoulders as the maknae's hands rested on his waist. All the nerves in Taehyung's body went numb, and he was unable to comprehend how close he was to Jungkook, his body filled with something he had never felt before. It was a warmth that enveloped him and put him at a high he had never thought possible to reach, causing his legs to weaken and his thoughts to scatter. 

        When Tae finally pulled away, he rested his forehead against Jungkook's, never wanting to leave, only to stand here forever. "I love you," he whispered, closing his eyes and enjoying the moment, his heart soaring above the clouds when he heard Jungkook's response. 

        "I love you too, hyung."


	5. 5

        "Seokjin, I'm so sorry," Jimin said in vain attempt to comfort his friend, "I know she meant a lot to you. If you want to talk about it, I'm right here."

        "You deserve better," Namjoon said, sitting down next to Jin on the couch, Jimin on his other side, the other members all squeezed onto the couch alongside them, "She only wanted you for the fame, and you know it."

        Tae watched the scene unfold, wishing he could comfort his hyung, but sympathy was not what he needed. It was the day of the concert, and they couldn't afford any distractions, yet here they were, comforting their oldest member at 7 in the morning. 

        "I didn't th-think..." Jin sniffed, tears streaming down his face as he spoke, "I didn't think it would be this big a deal. I just didn't want to announce it y-yet, that's all. I don't understand why she-" his voice broke and he buried his face in his hands, sobbing. As he said this, Taehyung thought about what would happen if word of Jungkook and himself got out. He knew there would be a huge scandal, and that it would most likely be shut down, exactly the opposite of what they wanted. 

        "You know what would be the best way to get back at her?" J-hope called out, answering the question before anybody could guess, "Showing her what she's missing out on at this concert. If you go out there and do your best, she'll understand that she made a mistake giving you up."

        "I don't want her back, I need to focus on the concert" Jin said, wiping the tears from his face, before breaking down into tears again, "I really do want her back though!"

        Jimin rubbed Jin's back, looking at his watch. "Guys, you have to be at the stadium by eight, so you have about an hour. You need to go get ready. Namjoon and I will stay here with Jin a little longer and then meet you up there, okay?"

        Everybody nodded in agreement, and Taehyung got up, his knees weak as stress filled his heart, along with sorrow for Jin. As he was walking out of the room, he grabbed Jungkook and pulled him into the bathroom, closing the door and locking it so the others couldn't intrude. 

        "Jungkook-ah, you're going to stay with me, right?" he asked, his eyes watering over as he willed them not to, biting his lip as the other man responded. 

        "Of course, hyung," Jungkook replied, taking hold of Tae's hands, and meeting his eyes, "I'll stay with you forever."

        "Thank you," Tae said softly.

        "Why do you ask this when you already know the answer?"

        "I'm afraid the answer isn't what I think it is."

        "Don't be afraid, hyung. I'll always be there for you. I promise."

***

        "I'm fine," Jin insisted, trying to get everybody to go away, "Focus on the performance, not me." He sat in his chair, getting his makeup done as the other members attempted to boost his confidence with compliments. 

        "Hyung, we're just worried for you," Taehyung stated, smiling at Jin. 

        "Don't be," Jin said, "I'm fine, seriously."

        The other members reluctantly retreated, back to their stylists who resumed applying their makeup and fixing their hair. Tae sat in his chair next to Jungkook, his eyes flicking over to his friend's face every once in a while, but he had closed his eyes and seemed to be sleeping. 

        "You ready for the performance?" he asked Jungkook, who's eyes shot open at the sound of his voice. 

        "Yeah, how about you?" Jungkook responded, looking over.

        "Of course I'm ready," Tae replied as his stylist finished, giving him the thumbs-up to walk around, "why wouldn't I be?"

        "Well, you didn't seem so ready this morning," Jungkook said, smiling slyly, and Taehyung glanced at his friend's stylist, wishing Jungook wouldn't give away so much of his personal information. 

        "Yeah, but what you don't realize is that I was lying to get you in an emotional state so you wouldn't do so well onstage and I could get some of the glory for once."

        "Yes, that was definitely what happened," Jungkook said sarcastically, standing up as his stylist finished. 

        "You know that was a compliment?" Tae nudged Jungkook, continuing to tease him. 

        "I most certainly do. By the way, compliments boost my self-esteem, which helps me do better on stage. Good luck getting any attention at all out there now."

        "Ah, shut up," Tae laughed as they walked to where the other members stood running over some last minute changes to the performance.

***

        The crowd cheered as Namjoon stepped onto the stage, the rest of the members following in single file.  Tae made a peace sign to the crowd, smiling excitedly, easily able to hide his nervousness. The lights flashed, sweeping this way and that as the first song began to play and Namjoon's voice rang out, rapping the beginning. 

***

        "What a spectacular performance by BTS!" the announcer cheered along with the crowd, walking over to the seven menbers, a spring in the man's step. "Now it's time for a little Q&A with BTS, using questions sent by fans to twitter with tagged with #AskBTS..."

        The announcer continued to talk, and Tae half listened, looking over at Jungkook, who was listening intently. Their performance had been one of their best ones yet, and Taehyung was quite happy with how he had performed, proud of his growing skills, even if he did have some weak points he would have to work on extra hard.

        As the announcer finished with a question for Namjoon, Jungkook looked up at V, locking eyes with him for a moment, a sweet smile spreading across his face that caused Taehyung's stomach to twist into nervous knots.

        Zoning back into the world, Taehyung looked away, listening to the end of Namjoon's response to the question. He nodded in agreement, looking back at Jungkook, who hadn't looked away, but was still staring at him intently, Tae's heart beginning to beat faster and everything being forgoten as he was lost in Jungkook's deep brown eyes.

        Their eye contact was broken as Jungkook looked away to the sound of multiple screams coming from a focused area in the crowd. Tae didn't turn to see what the commotion was about, but was caught by surprise when Jungkook's content expression turned to one of horror. 

        He quickly turned to look into the crowd, searching for the source of the screaming, and easily identified many people who had gotten down, attempting to crawl under their seats. In the midst of them, only 100 yards away was a man dressed in black, with a mask covering his face. He was holding up a pistol, taking aim carefully. There was no time to react when he realized that it was pointed directly at him.

        Bang.

        Taehyung  stepped back, but time seemed to move in slow motion. He barely remembers what happened next, but did recall the feeling of someone tackling him, their strength and weight combined throwing him to the floor.

        When he opened his eyes, his vision was black, and his ears rang. Waves of pain jolted through his head, and he could feel the pain coming from where the back of his head had fallen against the floor. Slowly his vision began to clear, and he looked up to see Jungkook laying on top of him, his head rested on Tae's chest. He realized suddenly that Jungkook was the person who had tackled him. Though pain racked through his body, Taehyung knew he had not been shot, or it would have been much worse. 

        Glad he had cushioned Jungkook's fall, Taehyung called the maknae's name but he could barely hear himself over the ringing in his ears. When Jungkook didn't respond, he sat up, his back aching though it was nothing compared to the worry building in his chest. Tae gently rolled Jungkook off himself, carefully setting the him onto the ground next to them. 

        Horror filled him as he looked down at the maknae, who's right hand found it's way into Tae's own, and Tae squeezed it reassuringly, though he felt as if he was going to faint.

        Blood seeped from an unknown wound in the idol's chest, staining his clothes crimson red. The injured man's eyes were fixed intently on Tae's own, watching his friend who had frozen in terror. His heart might have stopped, because as he looked at Jungkook, his heart sank and he felt dead. Horror filled his body, and tears leaked from his eyes, but he willed himself not to cry, to stay strong for Jungkook. His mind readjusted, and he fumbled around with his open hand to find the wound, somewhere along the side of Jungkook's chest. Tears blurred his vision as he frantically applied pressure to the wound. Jungkook's eyes fluttered as he let out a groan, 

        "No! I'm right here Kookie, I'm right here," he said shakily, looking into Jungkook's eyes as he pressed down on the wound, "Just focus on me. Don't leave, please. I'll do anything."

        "Taehyung..." Jungkook couched, squeezing his hyung's hand back, "I'm glad it was me."

        Although Tae continued to plead, Jungkook's eyes slowly closed, his body going limp, the weak rising and falling of his chest the only proof that he wasn't dead. Yet. "No, Jungkook-ah! Stay with me! You promised!" Tae's voice weakened as he was racked with fear, tears streaming down his face.

        The next thing he knew, Namjoon had shoved him aside, using his own method to attempt to slow the bleeding, though they would need to get Jungkook to the hospital to truly save him. 

        Bang.

        There was more screaming as another shot rang out, and Tae was pulled away from Jungkook by a security guard, but his hand was still clinging to the wounded singer's own. Tae desperately clutched the maknae, pleading to be let be, but was thrown into a world of horror and isolation as the blood that coated his hand caused Jungkook to slip through his fingers.


	6. 6

"We should give him some space," Namjoon's voice wafted into Tae's room as he spoke to the other members who had come to see how he was doing. "He's not been faring too well after--" the voice broke off.

"We understand, hyung," Jimin responded, and he heard some shuffling outside the door, "We can come back later."

There were a few murmurs of agreement, and Tae heard more shuffling, before the apartment door clicked shut.  

After a few more seconds, Namjoon peeked into Taehyung's room, only to find him exactly as he had left him, curled up under his covers, dressed in his pajamas only because Namjoon had changed him so he didn't get blood on his sheets. He didn't even look up as Namjoon entered, his eyes still closed. The curtains were closed, and it was early in the day, light attempting to peek around the curtains. 

Even though he had sat here for almost two days now, he felt as if what had happened at the concert had been just a few minutes ago, the horrifying memory seared into his brain. His emotions were scattered, his thoughts empty, but crowded at the same time, worries filling his chest, though it felt empty. When he thought about what happened, he felt numb, even though emotions ate away at him from every angle.

There was a certain loneliness that plagued him while he lay in wait, as if there should be someone on the other side of his bed to comfort him. 

He hadn't spoken in the past two days, and he could tell Namjoon was worried about him, always coming to check in on him, leaving food on his night stand, even though he wouldn't touch it, wouldn't move. The only comfort was his hyung's voice. Namjoon would sit at the end of the bed, watching Tae and talking to him. Though his eye's weren't open, Tae knew that his elder was watching him, he could feel his gaze. 

When he talked, it wasn't like a conversation. Namjoon was the only one who talked. He went on and on about anything, everything. His deep, caring voice comforted Taehyung in a way that he couldn't express, even if it didn't drive away all the pain. He talked about many things, from what was on the news that morning to when visiting hours for Jungkook would begin, or how the maknae was doing. This is how Tae knew that he had undergone a surgery, how he knew that they still hadn't removed the bullet despite all their efforts. Tae also knew that Jungkook was not available to visit this soon after his surgery, but would be in 30 minutes. He had only opening his eyes when Namjoon was gone, to see what time it was currently, and how far away that would be. 

After he had entered the room, Namjoon set something down on the night stand, Tae listening quietly. "I brought you some soup," the older man said, "please eat some. You need to keep up your strength. For Jungkook. Stay strong for him, okay?"

Tae didn't respond, and he felt empty as Namjoon left, leaving him alone in his room, sitting in the dark. 

***

Jungkook will be open to visitors in 30 minutes. 

Tae stared as his clock, willing the hand to move faster, wishing he could be with Jungkook. He still hadn't moved since Namjoon came in to give him soup, the lunch sitting on his nightstand, now cold. Namjoon had come in again to tell Tae that he was leaving, that if he was needed, he was only a phone call away. 

That had been a while ago, and Taehyung took that into account as he finally sat up, exhausted. He had been unable to sleep lately, his mind always whirling though it felt empty, his body restless even as he lay still. 

He quickly changed into something casual, but fairly bland compared to his usual clothing. Then he looked at the clock, judging that the hospital was about 20 minutes away. He would make it on time. 

***

Taehyung had taken a taxi to the hospital, as he had no other way of getting there. It was strange to see the cheerful white building, the smiling nurses and doctors who passed him in the hallways as he made his way to the visitor's station. 

They greeted him cheerfully, smiles spread across their too-happy faces that made him want to wring their necks. As soon as he told them who he was here for, the smiles disappeared, as if into thin air.  He could feel the pity that rode on their words as they told him which room he was looking for. He would have most likely gotten lost, but a doctor volunteered to take him, claiming he was headed that way also. Something in his sympathizing eyes told Tae otherwise. 

***

(Go back to read the first scene from Chapter 1 if you don't remember)

"Taehyung," a soft voice said, shaking Tae awake, "You had us all worried. Why didn't you tell anybody where you were?"

Tae looked up to see Jimin standing over him, his eyes filled with worry. He was sitting in a chair next to Jungkook's hospital bed, and he quickly retracted his hand from beneath Jungkook's, but didn't turn back to Jimin, his mouth staying shut as he didn't even try to form a response. He didn't know how long he had been here, the only hint being the darkened room as the sun began to set. Jungkook remained motionless as ever, the only proof that he was alive being the mechanic rising and falling of his chest, his heartbeat stable on the monitor. 

His mind was more relaxed here, his emotions fading from their turmoil, his body relaxing. It wasn't as much that it was gone, only temporarily paused, numbed by the fact that he was here with Jungkook. His earlier spinning mind was calmed, his thoughts truly empty now. Even as the other members entered the room later on, even as they tried to speak to him, he stayed silent, focused on Jungkook, focused on right now. 

Maybe it was that the past held pain he didn't want to go through again, or that the future had the possibility of more pain, but whatever the reason his mind stayed fixated on the present. The calmness of the room helped to contribute to a soft, quiet environment, and before he knew it, he was asleep again, his hand once more curled around Jungkook's. 

***

Namjoon let him stay there overnight, sleeping in a chair alongside Taehyung and Jungkook, watching over them as they slept. A doctor had come in to check on Jungkook, before informing Namjoon of his state, going over what had happened during the surgery, and their course of action as a result. 

"The bullet entered on the right side of his chest, in a diagonal path, slipping right between his ribs and tearing through some lung tissue, though that was easily repairable. It tore into a small part of his right atrium, which we were quick to fix. There were other minor injuries that we have fixed, or are working on fixing. This is all going to be okay, but there is one that might not. The bullet is currently lodged into his spine, and we can't remove it without risking his life, as we don't know how close it is to his spinal cord, or how removing it would damage his spine. Hopefully it will slowly come out on it's own, but otherwise he may not be able to move until we have found a way to dislodge the bullet carefully," the doctor reported.

"So you're saying we have to sit here and wait it out, hoping all ends well?" Namjoon asked, his lack of sleep starting to show in irritability. 

"Unfortunately, yes," the doctor said, "There is nothing more we can do for him, other than remove the bullet blindly, but that has too many risks."

"What if it succeeded?" Namjoon asked, "Do you know how much damage the bullet has done to his spine?"

"We do not. Any unnecessary movement could possibly severely injure him, or possibly even kill him. There's not much we can do without taking huge risks in cases like these."

"That's all it is to you, right?" Taehyung asked, Namjoon looking over to see him up and listening, his face twisted with anger and pain, "Just another case. Just another file you can read off later, another result to be recorded in your surgeries."

"Sir, I assure you that we are doing everything we can to--"

"Well apparently it's not enough! He's lying here, living only because of these machines you have hooked up to him, and you are telling me there's nothing we can to but sit and wait? You want us to play with our thumbs until he wakes up, until we know if he's going to die? You didn't know him! You don't know how when he smiled," Tae paused momentarily as tears slowly worked their way down his cheeks, his eyes filling with longing, "the whole world would stop to look at him, or how when he laughed, it was like listening to an angel. He was better than any of us. He didn't deserve this."

Tae's eyelids fluttered as he stepped back, turning his eyes to Jungkook, "I just wish I was in that bed instead of him."

Namjoon stepped forwards, telling the doctor with his eyes that he should leave as he pulled Tae into an embrace, comforting the younger member, "He wanted to save you," he said, tears appearing in his eyes even as he fought them off, "This is what he wanted."

Tae fought hard against this thought, knowing he could never blame Jungkook for this, his own self the true cause, but felt comforted. Though Namjoon's next words provided little truth, he felt comforted by the confidence at which they were spoken, the reality at which they created, even if the truth was unknown. 

"Everything is going to be okay."


	7. 7

"Time heals all wounds."

Taehyung tossed this phrase around in his mind as he sat in a chair in the hospital room. The bed next to him was empty, and he felt dead, as if he would never be able to move again, never be able to feel joy. He desperately hoped that this phrase was true, but something in his heart told him otherwise, though he couldn't quite place what it was. 

"Taehyung?" Namjoon's voice called from nearby, and Tae slipped back into reality, his eyes flicking towards his hyung, but his mouth closed. 

"I know this is hard for you, it's hard for me too," Namjoon empathized, "There's nothing that we can do but wait, and hope it all turns out well. I'm really, truly sorry."

"I don't want your pity," Tae responded solemnly, "I want Jungkook. If you can't give me that, I'd like to ask you to leave me alone."

The words were cruel, and he knew it, but didn't have the strength to care. Namjoon wouldn't leave him alone, but he needed the silence of an empty room right now, he needed privacy. It felt wrong to say something so rude to Namjoon, who had been taking care of him so well when he hadn't taken care of himself. He was thankful, but right now it was just too much, and he didn't have the courage to right his words, watching silently as his hyung reluctantly left.

Once Namjoon was gone, Tae turned to look back at the bed next to him that had held Jungkook just an hour ago, but was now empty, the machines detached in a hurry, everything showing signs of the havoc that had been wreaked through this room just an hour ago, turning the world into mush for Taehyung. 

He extended a hand towards the bed, wishing to be able to see Jungkook, to touch him, but his hand felt nothing there, only the empty sheets and the hard mattress. 

"I need you," he whispered as a tear rolled down his cheek, "Please don't leave me."

 

"I... I would never leave you," a raspy voice responded, the beautifully familiar tone causing Taehyung to jerk his head up to where Jungkook lay in the bed, his soft brown eyes now open and focused solely on Taehyung, his breathing more steady than before. 

"Jungkook?" Tae asked, almost exploding with joy as he felt the maknae squeeze his hand. 

"I promised," Jungkook said, crushing any doubt that Tae was hallucinating, "I'll always be there for you."

Taehyung felt his chest lighten, warmth coursing through his veins as he watched a bunny smile spread across the younger member's face. He had to stop himself as he felt the urge to embrace the injured boy in front of him, for fear of moving him in any way or causing the bullet to move even in the slightest. 

"I thought--" Taehyung said, a tear of rolling down his cheek as he spoke, "I thought you were going to die. Please don't ever do anything that stupid again."

Jungkook smiled, "I saved you from getting shot, and I would do it again a million times over."

"I would never let you do it again, even a single time," Tae laughed, "and I still wish you hadn't done it in the first place." 

"I would do anything to protect you, Taehyung-ah," Jungkook responded, "and you might as well not talk about it, because there's nothing you can do to change my mind." 

"Why are you so stubborn?" he asked, squeezing Jungkook's hand. 

"It's just who I am," he smiled, but was cut short mid sentence. 

Taehyung looked over to see Jungkook's eyes roll back into his skull, his body beginning to spasm violently. 

"No," he whispered, before throwing himself over Jungkook to hold him down, trying not to let him move as he clicked the button to call the nurse in. "Help!" he called while trying to keep Jungkook still, "We need help in here!"

Jungkook had always been stronger than Tae, and though he used all of his strength into this one task, Tae still found the younger was able to shake violently even as he was held down.

Though it may have only been a minute, it felt like an hour until someone did arrive, Taehyung not even noticing as they pulled open the door and walked in. He felt himself pulled back by a nurse who quickly rolled Jungkook onto his left side along with the doctor, and unhooked some of the wires attached to him. 

Taehyung tried to make his way to Jungkook's side again, but was blocked by another nurse who had come in to help. "Sir, I'm sorry but you need to leave the area," she said to him, attempting to lead him outside, but he pushed her away, trying to get back to Jungkook. 

"No! He was fine!" he called, "How did this happen? I need to help!"

"Sir!" the nurse said again, this time pulling him towards the door, "You can help by waiting in the visitor area, you can't be in here right now."

Tae watched the doctors working around Jungkook, one now performing CPR, the other calling for a crash cart. 

"We need to get him to the OR if he's going to live!" One of them called, and the nurses unlocked the wheels of the bed, rolling it out towards the hallway. As Tae heard and watched his, his heart sank more than he thought possible, the idea of Jungkook dying after he had just been awake and talking to horrible to even process. 

"You don't understand," Tae pleaded with the nurse who blocked his way, "I have to be with him! If he dies..."

"Look at me," the nurse said as Tae gave up, his words catching in his throat, "We will do anything it takes to keep him alive. Trust me. Right now the best way you can help is to calm down and wait in the visitor area. I'll get back to you as soon as possible."

Taehyung watched as she jogged away from him, joining up with the other doctors and nurses that were escorting their patient down the hall. He watched them until they turned around a corner, and the dark brown blob of hair that is Jungkook disappeared. 

Tae's legs felt weak, and his mind was jumbled as if it was a snow globe that had just been shaken. He sank to his knees as his shaking legs gave out, and collapsed upon himself, feeling more lonely than he ever had in his life, but all of his tears had been used up over the past days, his eyes dry. 

'If he dies,' Tae thought to himself, 'no amount of time could heal this wound.'

 

Somewhere along the lines, Namjoon had come into the room to wait with Taehyung, accompanied by all of the other members who attempted to comfort Taehyung, and ease the story out of him. He kept his mouth shut, barely hearing what they were saying as he drifted in and out of reality, his mind seeming to lose itself among his scattered thoughts. 

He stayed here for a very long time, watching the door of the room for anyone to come in an inform him on what was happening to Jungkook, but nobody came. 

It was growing dark, and while some of the other members lay down to try to sleep, Taehyung sat where he was, knowing he would never be able to fall asleep, or even close his eyes until he knew what had happened to Jungkook.

Eventually the door to the room opened, and a doctor walked in, his eyes scanning over the people waiting in the room as he walked to the center so he could be heard by everyone. Tae's heart beat furiously as he waited to be told what had happened, crossing his fingers unconsciously. 

"Surgery went well," the doctor's voice rang out, and it took a few moments for the words to process for the tired, anxious members who sat in the room, listening intently. "The bullet had gone too deep, which is what caused the seizures, so our only option was to remove it, or pray they he survived. There was a very small chance it would actually work, but everything went smoothly. It's super important that he had no visitors right now so we are keeping him in another room, but he will be moved back here as soon as possible and you can all visit him then."

Everyone sat in silence, relief seeming to flood through to room, Taehyung letting out a breath he hadn't realized he had been holding, and Namjoon was the first to respond. 

"Thank you so much for saving Jungkook," he said, resting a hand on Taehyung's shoulder, "We'll all come to visit him as soon as you say we can."

The doctor nodded to Namjoon before turning and leaving the room, the older boy motionong for Tae to follow him. 

"Jungkook's going to be alright, but you need to get some sleep," he said, allowing a light smile of relief to tug at his lips.

***

"He's still in a fragile state from the surgery, but he woke up a few hours ago so he'll be conscious,"the doctor warned the group as they walked down the hallway to Jungkook's room, "Recovery will take a long time, but it seems as he'll almost be back to normal within the next four months."

Taehyung felt himself fill with hope at the last comment, barely able to contain his excitement in seeing Jungkook.

After he had been reassured that the maknae was okay the day before, he had been able to sleep better than he had in the past week, now full of pent up energy the next morning. 

"He's right in here," the doctor said, pointing to a door to the left, "I'll be back to check on him in a couple of hours."

As the doctor walked away, Namjoon gestured for Taehyung to go in. "We'll give you two some time," he said, motioning for the others to disperse, "See you in a little bit."

Taehyung nodding in thanks, turning towards the door nervously. His heart seemed to skip a beat at the thought of walking in and seeing Jungkook there, alive and well. 

He quickly slid a hand through his hair, thankful that Namjoon had forced him to take a showed the night before. Then he twisted the handle of the door in front of him, peeking in timidly. 

As his eyes scanned the room, they landed on a figure sitting in the hospital bed, Jungkook already staring at him, alerted by the sound of the door opening. As soon as he saw Taehyung, a smile spread across his face, and the older boy's heart skipped a beat. 

"Jungkookie," he smiled, almost crying in joy as he stepped closer, "I th-thought you were going to d-die." His voice was much weaker than he would have liked, but at the moment it didn't matter, as long as they were together. 

"I promised," Jungkook responded, his voice raspy as if it hurt to speak, "I'll always be there for you." He let out a small cough as Taehyung approached, barely strong enough to reach out his hand for the older member to hold as he stooped over the bed. 

"You've never been one to lie," Tae let out a lighthearted laugh, his body so overfilled with joy at the sensation of being able to make contact with the warm, lively boy even after he was so close to death. He leaned down, closing his eyes as he set his lips against the younger boys, the joy of being so close still as overwhelming as the first time they had kissed, sending a flutter up his spine. 

Jungkook smiled as he breathed in the scent of Taehyung, content with just staring into the older boy's eyes as he pulled away, "I don't plan on breaking that promise anytime soon."


End file.
